Instead of being overwhelmed with Christmas stresses, piling up gifts under the tree to be torn open in an avaricious half hour, or stirring and baking and frying and chopping and mixing all our favourite foods to be devoured over one or two big days, I'm a fan of stretching out the little joys. I take my lead from a two-year old who, when first discovering the joys of the wrapped gift, is delighted to tease off the paper small piece by small piece. "I did it, Nana. I ripped it all off!"
Similarly, instead of trying to include everyone at our Christmas table or visit everyone over that one day -- oh, those early years of attending my family's Christmas Eve, then after having "our" Christmas morning together opening gifts, driving out to his family's Christmas dinner -- we spent the day with my mom on Saturday, taking her for a lovely long walk by the river and then out to the IHOP for lunch. Then Sunday we treated Pater's parents to a delicious brunch at Stanley Park's wonderful Fish House Restaurant with our three daughters, two of the partners, and Nola. Since the older folks don't host family gatherings anymore and live a bit far out for the kids to get to easily, those generations don't get together often enough. A lovely meal together, dressed casual-festive, in a wonderful setting (heritage building with vistas of surrounding parkland) -- what gift could surpass this celebration of family well-being and good fortune?!
I'm also going to remember that the gift itself isn't the important element, although I will choose as carefully as I can. Rather, it's the company in which we will open it, the feelings of love that, if we're attentive to what really matters, will accrue to the season for little persons like Nola -- who can keep teaching the rest of us the joys and gifts of Christmas
Grandparents kept saying "Oh, the grandchildren are so good-looking" "Their partners are really nice, aren't they!" but especially, "That Nola is so smart" and "Isn't that Nola cute!" -- in other words, a gift that unfolded slowly. . .
Today, I'm meeting my sisters for drinks and then dinner. Yes, there will be some nasty forays into too-busy shops before that, but I'm hoping to get in and out before the worst of it, and I am pretty focused on what matters. I'm going to savour choosing a book for each of our kids and partners, and hope that it can be opened with this much anticipation . . .
For years, when people would ask if I were ready for Christmas, I would answer something like "It's coming whether I am or not" signalling that I would cope with the day whatever my level of readiness. Now, I think I'm more likely to say that it's already here and that I'm making the most of it. The religious significance of Christmas is an important part of my upbringing and cultural background, but the date itself, the one-day celebration of Christ's birth, is a fairly recent construction historically. I still love the treasures of that one focussed Eve and Day, but I'm already beginning to open the Gift. After all, learning from a very small child is part of the meaning of Christmas, no?
How about you? What Christmas gifts are you already opening?